Gridiron Girl


Fabulous Fantasy Football Tips and Tactics by BDazzle

Hey All! With fantasy football draft season  in full-swing, who better than me, Gridiron Girl — an expert of all things football AND fabulous —  to give you a list of fantasy tips…

Get Pumped.

  • No one likes a mindless follower, so zig when everyone else zags and select a kicker with your first pick. This will signal to everyone that you’re not going to abide by their preconceived notions of “strategy” and “competence.”
  • The second round is considered the “Alliteration Round,” so be on the lookout for players like Ray Rice, Brian Brohm, Joe Jurevicious and Wes Welker.
  • Handcuffing is essential for Fantasy Success — be sure to draft a lot of Cincinnati Bengals.
  • Follow punter stats closely — field position affects scoring on all three phases of fantasy football.
Brad Maynard devastates another Fantasy Team.
  • Know your league scoring format; some leagues use “PPR” scoring. If you are in a Points-Per-Retribution league — where points are scored for cheap shots and poor sportsmanship — consider moving Hines Ward and Albert Haynesworth up your draftboard.
  • Be aware of “bye weeks”: The more players you draft with the same bye week the stronger your team is for the rest of the season.
  • If your draft is in-person, nothing intimidates other owners like the severed head of a pig perched precariously close to the edge of your drafting table.
  • Drafting live is like playing poker. Make sure to wear sunglasses and a promotional hat.
  • If you pick up a Gramatica early, make sure you nab a sibling deeper in the draft… You never can have too many Gramaticas.

  • A league is not won on draft day, but it can be wasted away in a blur of hotwings and Monster energy drink.
  • Remember, fantasy football is primarily for losers. You can avoid this stigma by periodically reminding everyone that you’re still cool by performing Austin Powers impressions and referencing Bud Light commercials.
  • Consistent, and accurate-throwing Chad Pennington is a low-risk, high-reward, fucking-boring choice for QB.
  • Utility players like Chris Cooley are especially valuable; Cooley will have tight end, running back, and finger-pointing duties for the Redskins this season.
  • Drafting other owners’ backup running backs is an excellent way to throw away draft picks AND be a dick.
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Belichick Gets Randy Behind Closed Doors by BDazzle

If you ask this Gridiron Girl — what goes on behind closed doors is everyone’s business.  Sure, at some point you’ll want to get Randy, but next time you plan a secret “workout”, maybe you should work out a better alibi first.

BY FOR NOW!  -G.G.

http://sports.yahoo.com/nfl/news?slug=ap-patriots-tampering&prov=ap&type=lgns

Belichick denies tampering accusation by Davis
By HOWARD ULMAN, AP Sports Writer
Oct 1, 6:00 pm EDT

FOXBOROUGH, Mass. (AP)—Patriots coach Bill Belichick denied Wednesday the claim by Raiders owner Al Davis that New England had a workout with Randy Moss before obtaining him in a trade with Oakland.

Davis said Tuesday that the Patriots had tampered with Moss before the deal in April 2007 that brought the wide receiver to the Patriots for a fourth-round choice that year on the weekend of the NFL draft.

“I’ve told the story about Randy many, many times,” Belichick said in a conference call with members of the media covering the 49ers, “and the first time I ever talked to Randy was the Sunday morning of the second day of the draft last year.

“So that’s the first time I met him. That’s the first time I talked to him. There was no workout. There was no other contact with him.”

Davis made the tampering accusation after ending a news conference in which he announced the firing of coach Lane Kiffin.

Asked Wednesday if he had a response to Davis, Moss said, “No, not at all.”

Belichick sidestepped the question when asked by New England reporters, saying he was concentrating on Sunday’s game at San Francisco.

In an e-mail to The Associated Press, NFL spokesman Greg Aiello said Wednesday, “No tampering charges have ever been filed with our office with respect to Randy Moss.”

Moss, disgruntled for most of his two seasons with the Raiders, set an NFL single-season record with 23 touchdown receptions in his first season with New England.

Davis said other teams didn’t want Moss before the Patriots obtained him.

“You know how many teams turned him down?” Davis said. “That guy in Green Bay thought he couldn’t run any more. Even Denver, where they’ll take anybody, turned him down.”

He did not identify the person in Green Bay.

Davis said former Raiders senior personnel executive Michael Lombardi, who was fired 10 days after the Moss trade, spoke to Belichick about Moss.

“What’s his name knew he could run, he’s a friend of Belichick’s. Mike Lombardi,” Davis said Tuesday. “Mike sold what’s his name, Belichick, on the idea that he could run. They tampered with him. I remember (Patriots owner) Bob Kraft saying that he had to look him in the eye and all that. They went down and worked him out, he could run. He’s their team, of course, with the quarterback.”

Moss had 98 catches during the regular season last year, 22 in the first three games. With Brady out for the season after hurting his knee in the opener, Moss has 12 catches in three games.